


Even If It Hurts

by Pixeled



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII
Genre: M/M, Major character death - Freeform, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:14:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25988005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixeled/pseuds/Pixeled
Summary: He’d do it over again.As much as it hurt.So he breathed.Slow.Slow.Even as the pain seared through him.
Relationships: Aerith Gainsborough & Tseng, Reno/Tseng (Compilation of FFVII)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	Even If It Hurts

**Author's Note:**

> To Sam Tinnesz’s “Even If It Hurts”
> 
> I’m truly sorry. I don’t know why I hurt myself like this then inflict it on others.

It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

As Reno trudged alongside Tseng in the desert of the terrain outside the target location he kept looking at Tseng’s face. He was slowing down. His legs jerked as he moved, kicking up sand, as if walking on impulse, as if survival was the only thing that mattered, but his eyes were glassy with pain and he didn’t respond to Reno’s chatter.

Reno was starting to get really worried. He stopped Tseng, undid the buttons of his jacket with trembling fingers, and tossed it to the side. It was hot anyway. He ripped one of his sleeves off and cut off the bleeding in his arm. The stomach wound, he scrambled to think what could serve as a compress. He ended up grabbing the jacket back up and tying it as tightly around Tseng’s stomach over the wound as he could, desperate. It was already bleeding through it a few moments later, wet with dripping blood.

“Fuck!” Reno growled. All the Materia and potions in the world weren’t helping and he didn’t know why, and he himself had nails embedded in his hands and stomach and chest from a nail gun. Even he knew not to remove those. “C’mon Tseng, I can’t carry you, man.”

“Leave me here,” Tseng whispered.

“What?! No! I’m not leaving you here!” He tried again to contact the rescue team, but only static came back. “Fuck fuck fuck! Okay, I got an idea.” Reno got in front of Tseng. “Wrap your arms around me and I’ll drag you.”

Tseng tried, but after a few steps his arms went slack and he collapsed down onto his knees, spitting up blood.

“Tseng!”

“It’s my time to return to the planet,” Tseng whispered, collapsing onto his back.

“No no no,” Reno chanted desperately, pressing his hands hard against the stomach wound, grabbing a potion and pouring it directly over it, but bloody liquid just poured into the sand. “Please! Please! I can’t lose you!”

“You’ll be a good Director,” Tseng whispered, smiling softly.

“What! Tseng, you know that’s not true! I can’t do this without you!”

“You’ll be all right,” Tseng shook his head slowly. He reached his hand up to Reno’s grabbed it, kissing it all over.

“Don’t leave me. Please. I love you.”

“You’ll see me again,” Tseng rasped, coughing, blood dripping from his mouth. Reno didn’t care. He still kissed those lips.

Even as he did, the swirl of Lifestream enveloped them. A hand reached down and Tseng took it. It was a woman’s hand. Her hair flowed all around her as if moving through water, and her dress was white and moved fluidly around her.She was barefoot. The strong scent of lilies filled the desert. Aerith, the flower girl, the Cetra, the Ancient. Reno knew who it was. Reno tried to cover Tseng with his body, to shield him from death.

“Tseng, you took care of me for so many years; it’s my turn to take care of you. Let go. There’s nothing to be afraid of. There’s no pain where you’re going.” Then she looked at Reno. “I’ll take care of him for you. I promise. And when it’s time, you’ll be with him again.”

Reno held onto Tseng, tears flowing, desperation making his heart race. And then he was holding nothing, collapsing into the sand, the green swirl slowly fading.

A chilling scream filled the vast expanse of the desert, and Reno rocked back and forth for a long time before he pulled himself up and started walking again, heading west. That was where the convoy and chopper were. West. He just had to go west. West west west.

Eventually he saw something on the horizon. He felt numb even though he had cried for an hour straight. He was moving, he was doing, but his heart felt hollow.

He was sent in the chopper straight to medical, but he only looked up, his eyes seeing nothing. When they came to give him numbing medication he waved them off.

Even if it hurt, even if he bled, even if it was razor deep, he wanted to feel _something_.

As much as it hurt losing Tseng, he’d have loved him a thousand times over, for a thousand lifetimes.

So many times he asked him to lean on him, to ease the burden, but Tseng wasn’t that type of man. He shouldered his burdens in secret. He never broke down.

Reno had blinked.

Just once.

And everything went to shit.

So even if it hurt, he’d think of Tseng.

No regrets.

He’d do it over again.

As much as it hurt.

So he breathed.

Slow.

Slow.

Even as the pain seared through him.


End file.
